II. I strongly advise any one who feels this excessive

thirst to be very cautious, for this temptation is sure

St. John vii. 37 : “ Si quis sitit veniat ad me, et bibat.”
Escorial edition, ch. xxxii. Tells us how we can sometimes
moderate supernatural impulses.

9

130 THE WAY OF PERFECTION. [CHAP. XIX.

to occur. Although possibly it may not kill her, yet
her health may be impaired ; besides, however un-
willingly, she will show her feelings by exterior signs,
which ought by all means to be avoided. Sometimes all
our efforts to hide our sentiments are fruitless. Let us
be careful not to yield to any strong impulse towards
fomenting this longing, but gently put it aside by turning
our thoughts to some other subject.^® Occasionally
nature may have as much to do with these feelings as
divine love : some characters are eager about everything,
both good and bad. I do not consider such persons very
mortified, yet mortification is always good.

12. It seems foolish to hinder so good a thing, yet it
is really wise conduct. I do not mean that these long-
ings should be stifled, but moderated, which may be done
by encouraging some other desire that would be quite
as meritorious . I will explain my meaning by an
example — a man has a vehement longing to be with
God and to be delivered from “ this prison,” as St.
Paul styled it. No small mortification will be needed
to restrain this most delicious pain ; indeed, it cannot
always be done. But he may be so overcome by it as
almost to lose his reason ; I saw this happen to some one
a short time ago. Although naturally impulsive, she
was so used to breaking her own will, that from what

Castle, M. vi. ch. vi. 6.

Rom. vii. 24 : “ Quis me liberabit de corpore mortis hujus ? ”

CHAP. XIX.] NECESSITY OF RESTRAINT. I3I

I witnessed on other occasions, I thought she had com-
pletely overcome it, yet once I saw her almost driven
mad by this pain and by her violent efforts to overcome
her feelings. In such an extreme case, in my opinion,
humility should make us fear, for we ought not to believe
that our charity is fervent enough to bring us to such a
state : I think there would be no harm in our changing
the bent of our wishes, although sometimes this is im-
possible. We may consider that by living longer we
might serve God more, and might be able to enlighten
some soul that would otherwise be lost ; and that if we
did more for God we should deserve to enjoy Him more.
Besides, we ought to feel alarm at thinking how little
we have done for our Creator. These are fitting con-
solations for this great distress. Thus we shall assuage
our pain and gain great merit, since for the sake of serving
the God we long for so keenly we are willing to suffer
and to bear our cross. It is like comforting some one
who is in great sorrow by bidding him to be patient and
to resign himself into the hands of God, that the divine
Will may be done in him : this resignation of ourselves
is always the safest course to take.

13. But what if the devil were in any way concerned
in these vehement desires ? This is probable, as in a
case mentioned by Cassian, I believe, of a very ascetic
hermit, whom the evil one persuaded to throw himself
2® Excl. xiv. 4.

13^ the way of perfection. [chap. XIX.

down a well in order to see God sooner. I do not think
the hermit’s life can have been either humble or holy,
or our Lord, Who is faithful, would never have allowed
him to be so utterly blinded. Most certainly, if the
impulse had been divine, it would have done the man no
harm. Celestial inspirations infallibly bring with them
prudence, light, and moderation, but this deadly enemy of
ours seeks to injure us in every way — since he is wary, let
us be the same. Moderation is often useful in similar cases,
such as shortening our time for prayer, however much we
may be enjoying it, if it tells on our health or begins to
make our head ache, for discretion is always necessary.

14. Why do you think, my daughters, that before
the battle has begun, I have told you of the end of the
conflict and shown you its reward by describing the
benefits of drinking of this fountain of living water ?
I did so to prevent your being dismayed at the hardships
and difficulties of the way, that you may be courageous

21 The hermit Heron was so austere that he refused to join
the brethren even at their usual feast at Easter. Deceived by
his presumption, he obeyed the order of Satan, disguised as an
angel of light, who assured the recluse that if he threw himself
down a deep well in the neighbourhood he would prove his
sanctity by remaining unhurt. Heron was pulled out by the
brethren and died three days afterwards from the injuries he had
received, still persisting in his delusion. The Abbot Paphnutius
considered that he had committed suicide and was with great
difficulty persuaded to allow him the usual memorial and oblation
granted to those at rest. (Cassian’s Conferences, Conference of the
Abbot Moses, ch. v.) The edition used by St. Teresa is not known.

133

CHAP. XX.] ALL ARE INVITED.

and not grow weary, lest, when you have reached the
spring and only have to stoop to drink of it, you may
draw back and forfeit all this grace, imagining that you
lack the strength to gain it, and that it is not meant for
you. Remember, our Lord invited “ Any man ” : He
is truth itself ; His word cannot be doubted. If all
had not been included He would not have addressed
everybody, nor would He have said : “I will give you
to drink.” He might have said : ” Let all men come,
for they will lose nothing by it, and I will give to drink
to those I think fit for it.” But as He said, uncon-
ditionally, '' If any man thirst let him come to Me,” I
feel sure that, unless they stop half-way, none will fail
to drink of this living water. May our Lord, Who has
promised to grant it us, give us grace to seek it as we
ought, for His own sake.