I. I OFTEN tell you, sisters, and now I leave it to you

here in writing, that not only those dwelling in this house,
but all who aspire after perfection, must fly a thousand

^ Valladolid edition, cb, xiv, ; Escorial, continuation of ch. xix.

CHAP. XIII.]

POINTS OF HONOUR.

8l

leagues away from saying, “ I was in the right : it was
not right for me to suffer this, they had no right to do
such a thing to me ! ” ^ Now God deliver us from such
wrong rights ! Do you think that there was any ques-
tion of rights when our good Jesus suffered the injuries
which were so unrighteously inflicted on Him ? I do
not know what any person is doing in a monastery who
will only bear a cross which people have a perfect right to
lay upon her — let her go back to the world where people
care nothing for such rights. Is it possible for you to
suffer so much that you ought not to suffer any more ?
What rights have you in this ? I do not know of them.
When we receive honours or affection or kind treatment
let us think what right have we to them, for certainly we
have no right to them in this life ; but when wrong is done
to us we call it so, though it does us no wrong — I do not
know why we should ever speak of it. Either we are
Brides of this great King or we are not. If we are, what
faithful wife does not share her husband’s disgrace, even
against her will ? In short, they share both honour and
shame together. To seek to share in His Kingdom and
to enjoy His presence, and yet to shun all parts in His
ignominy and His toils, is incompatible. God preserve
us from such a wish ! Let her who believes that her
sisters hold her the last of all, think herself the most
fortunate, as ‘ndeed she is, if she bears it as she ought,

2 Const. 30.

6

82 THE WAY OF PERFECTION. [CHAP. XIII.

and she will not fail to be honoured for it, both in this
world and in the next : you may trust my words.®

2. But what presumption for me to write “ You may
trust my words ! " when He Who is true Wisdom tells
us so, as does the Queen of Angels ! Let us, my daughters,
imitate, however feebly, the most holy Virgin, whose
habit we wear. Indeed, we feel ashamed to number
ourselves among her nuns, because, however deeply we
seem to humble ourselves, we are most unworthy to be
called the daughters of such a mother, and the brides of
such a Spouse, even if we copy her humility in any way —
“ in any way,” I say. However, though we may all
abase and humble ourselves, no one is so bound to do
this as myself, who, for my sins, deserve to be insulted and
despised by the devils themselves. Yet, although others
may not have committed so many faults, it will be wonder-
ful if they have done nothing that deserves hell. There-
fore, I repeat, you must not consider the defects I have
spoken of as insignificant, for, if you do not check them
carefully, what seems a trifle to-day will become a venial
sin to-morrow ; this is a thing of such evil growth that,

® “In order to profit and advance by means of persecutions
and injuries we meet with, it is well to reflect that God has been
offended by them before I have — when the blow strikes me,
He has already been affronted by the sin. The soul that truly
loves its Spouse ought to have already pledged itself to be en-
tirely His, and if He supports the insult, why should we resent
it ? . . . Die or suffer — this should be our wish ” (See ch. xii.
note 8).

CHAP. XIII.] PUNCTILIOUSNESS. 83

if left alone, it will spread, and is most injurious in com-
munities. We must be very watchful in such matters,
lest we injure those who are trying to help us and to give
us a good example. If we only realised the immense
harm that is done by introducing the bad habit of touchi-
ness about honour, we should die a thousand times rather
than be the means of doing so. That would be only
the death of the body, but the loss of souls is a terrible
one, and seems never-ending, for when one generation
dies, others succeed it, and perhaps they will all be in-
fluenced more by the one bad custom we began,'* than
by the many virtues they see practised, for the devil takes
care the evil habit is kept up, while the infirmity of human
nature destroys our virtues.®

3. What genuine charity, and how true a service of
God would it be, if the novice who sees that she cannot
conform to the customs of this convent, would acknow-
ledge it and go away before being professed, thus leaving
the nuns in peace. Other monasteries (if they will take
my advice) will not keep her, nor allow her to take the
vows without giving her several years’ probation, to
learn whether she will improve. I do not mean one
who cannot bear penances and fasting, for, though this
be a fault, it does not cause so much harm, but I am
speaking of those who wish to be esteemed and respected ;
who see others’ faults but never know their own, and who
^ Found, ch. i. 3. Castle, M. vii. ch. iv. 22. ® Const. 5.

^4 the way of perfection. [chap. xiii.

possess other defects of the same kind, which all take
their origin from a want of humility. If God does not
favour such a character with a great deal of light and
understanding, so that she amends in the course of years,
may He prevent you from retaining her in your Com-
munity ; for, be assured that she will never be at rest
herself nor leave others at peace. As you do not require
dowries, God preserves you from many dangers, for I
pity the monasteries, which, for the sake of not returning
the dowry or out of regard for her relations, keep a thief
who robs them of this treasure.®

4. In this convent you have abandoned and lost the
honour of this world, for the poor are not honoured ; nor
should you honour others at so dear a cost to yourselves.
Our honour, sisters, is to serve God ^ ; whoever should
hinder this had better remain at home with her honour. It
was to test the disposition of the novices that our Fathers
ordered a year’s probation for them ® (which in our Order
may be prolonged to four years),® and I wish that they

® Escorial edition, ch. xx. The great importance of refusing
to profess any one whose character is opposed to the virtues I
have described.

Life, ch. xi. 4 ; ch. xx. 34.

® Visit. 24, 25, 42. Const. 17, 41.

3 “ Four years’ probation.” There appears to be no
record of such a custom, so that the thought presents itself
that this was arranged between the Saint and the Bishop of
Avila, who at that time was Superior of the convent of St. Joseph.
It is certain that St. Teresa acted on this principle, because

CHAP. XIII.] INTERIOR MORTIFICATION. 85

were not professed for ten years, because a humble nun
would care little for the delay, knowing that if she were
good she would not be sent away, and if she were not,
why should she wish to stay and damage Christ’s com-
munity ? By not being “ good,” I do not mean an
attachment to worldly vanities, for, by the mercy of God,
I believe that those in this house are far from anything
of the sort, but I mean a want of mortification, self-
esteem, or a care for human respect and self, of the kind
I have spoken of. Let her who knows that she is not
very mortified believe what I say, and not make her
profession, unless she wishes to live in a very hell in this
life — and God grant she may not find herself in another
hell in the next world — for there is much in such dis-
positions to make one fear such a fate for her, though
perhaps neither she herself nor the nuns understand her
case as I do. Trust my words, otherwise you will learn
this truth in the future. The spirit of our Order bids us
not only to be nuns, but hermits, like our holy Fathers
in times past ; therefore we must be detached from all
created things. This grace of detachment is to be found
in any one to whom God has given our vocation, and
although at first she may not possess it in perfection, yet
we know that she has it by her joy at seeing she is cut

Maria de San Jose (Maria Davila), one of the first four novices,
was only professed on July 2, 1566, nearly four years after her
entrance.

86

THE WAY OF PERFECTION. [CHAP. XIII.

off from the world, and her delight in all the practices
of the religious life.^®

5. I repeat, that any one who is worldly, and who
does not improve, is not fit for our convents : she should
go somewhere else if she wishes to be a nun — if not, she
will see what will happen. Let her not complain that
it is my fault because I founded this house, and that I
do not warn her. This convent is a paradise {if paradise
can exist on earth) for any one who finds her sole happi-
ness in pleasing God,“ and who cares nothing for her
own comfort : such a person leads a very happy life here,
but, if she seeks for anything more, she will lose all the
rest, because nothing else is to be had. A discontented
mind resembles a man suffering from violent nausea,
whose stomach rejects all food, however good it may be :
while it loathes the meat which others relish. Any one
with the character I have described, may save her soul
more easily elsewhere than here, and may, by degrees,
attain the perfection which she could not do in this Order,
because here the mortifications must be accepted at
once ; for although time is allowed for attaining total
interior detachment and mortification, these virtues must
soon be practised outwardly, because of the harm their
absence may do to others. If seeing them performed
by all the nuns, and living among good companions should

10 Found, ch. xxviii. 37.

Castle, M. v. ch. iv. 5. Found, ch. i. 3. Life, ch* xxxv. 13.

CHAP. XIV.] RELIGIOUS SPIRIT. 87

not improve the new-comer in a year, or in six months,
I fear she will never make much progress, either in many
years or in few. I do not say she must be as perfect in
these qualities as the rest of the nuns, but she must make
visible progress towards the recovery of her spiritual
health, as she soon will do, if the disease is not mortal.